Traditional Temazcal Ceremony and Massage in Oaxaca

The herb-infused indigenous steam ritual at Temazcal Oaxaca opens your mind as well as your pores. Plus, you won’t believe how they cleanse you of negative energy.

Duke takes a seat in front of the temazcal, a sort of steam lodge that has been used by the Aztecs, Mixtecs and other indigenous people of Mexico.

I’ve always dreamed of embarking upon a spirit quest. Throw in a massage afterward, and it’s a no-brainer. I’m in. 

When I first read about temazcales in Viva Oaxaca: An Insider’s Guide to Oaxaca’s Charms by Robert Adler and Jo Ann Wexler, I knew Duke and I had to experience one. 

When researching which temazcal to try out, Duke was drawn to Temazcal Oaxaca, thanks to its Insta page. 

“She walked behind me and began to lightly beat me with a bundle of herbs. 

The temazcalera does this to cleanse you of negativity. This transfers the bad energy to the herbs, which are then burned. ”

Wally is ready to embark upon his temazcal spirit quest — part of an ancient tradition of the indigenous peoples of Mexico.

We had just wrapped up a folk art tour with the wonderful Linda Hanna, and when the time came, we found a car waiting outside our hotel, Casa Antonieta, ready to drive us to the village of Santa María Coyotepec for our temazcal experience. The driver turned out to be Nathan Dawson, the young man who designed, built and runs Temazcal Oaxaca with his girlfriend, Orosei Acevedo. 

The courtyard at Temazcal Oaxaca with the cold plunge tub off to the right

What Is a Temazcal?

The name translates to “house of hot rocks.” These brick structures — imagine a Native American sweat lodge shaped like an igloo — are a tradition used for various purposes by many of the ancient indigenous peoples of Mexico. Sure, Nathan told us, they were part of spiritual rituals, but the Aztecs used them to prepare soldiers for battle, the Mixtecs of the mountains used them to induce labor, and more recently, they’re used for general bathing — villagers can save on precious water and emerge smelling like fresh herbs. 

Traditionally, a woman known as a temazcalera will guide you through the process. This role is sometimes referred to as a shaman or curandera (folk healer). Every pueblo has a midwife, and she’s who acts as temazcalera, Nathan informed us. 

The peaceful area where you relax before and after your temazcal experience

Temazcal Oaxaca: “By Far the Best”

When we arrived, an expat couple from St. Louis had just finished their experience. They moved to Oaxaca a few years ago, and like every American we’ve met living here, they have no plans of going back to the States. 

The man encouraged us to take a shot of mezcal to loosen us up for the temazcal, so I squeezed orange slices into our thimble-sized goblets and we threw them back. It’s also recommended you drink a couple of glasses of water to hydrate before the steam bath. 

As we sat at the table, a spray of liquid hit my forearm. No one else saw or felt anything. I began to believe I was marked by an invisible spirit animal in preparation for my temazcal. 

When I asked Nathan later what it might have been, he said it was most likely one of the giant cicadas that live in the tree — which certainly wasn’t as glamorous a spirit animal as I was hoping for. 

As the couple left, the man told us, “I’ve been to temazcals all over, and this is by far the best. It’s not touristy; it’s the real deal.”

The temazcal is purposefully shaped like a womb.

Inside the Temazcal: Return to the Womb

We ducked our heads and entered the dark brick structure, sitting upon wooden stools in front of a fire that heats rocks. Our temazcalera, Narcedalia, knelt next to me, taking bundles of herbs, dipping them into a bucket of water and then placing them atop the hot rocks. An aroma filled the space, with many of the herbs working to open the lungs. We took deep breaths and entered a meditative state. My mind journeyed to a troubled relationship I have with a family member, suggesting that I should make the effort to repair it. 

Our lovely temazcalera, Narcedalia, guided us through the ritual.

A glimpse inside the temazcal — before the door shuts and you embark upon a dark, steamy spirit journey

Now and then, Narcedalia rattled off something in Spanish, and we mostly caught the gist. She explained that temazcales are good for the head, the heart, the stomach, her hand moving to each part of the body as she spoke them. 

When sweat poured down our faces, Narcedalia took our washcloths, wet them and refreshingly dabbed our faces. Every once in a while, she sang a quiet song from her home, Atzompa, a nearby pueblo known for its pottery. It was lovely to hear her soft, soothing voice, filling the chamber like a lullaby.  

As I sat there in the dark, imagining I was part of an ancient Mixtec group undergoing a ritual experience, Narcedalia walked behind me and began to lightly beat me with one of the bundles of herbs. The temazcalera does this to cleanse you of negativity. This transfers the bad energy to the herbs, which are then burned. 

As Nathan later explained, modern-day grandmothers carry on this tradition. If something bad happens or a child is scared, the abuela will rub an egg on the person, declaring that the evil is now in the egg, which she will then bury. Alternatively, she might lightly whip you with herbs to get rid of your fear — like they do in a temazcal.

“You’re transferring the negativity to the herb,” Nathan said. “Then you’re symbolically letting go of it, burning it on the rock.”

You’ll get lightly beaten by bundles of herbs to cleanse you of negativity during the temazcal ceremony.

After about 20 minutes or so (it’s impossible to know for sure, as the experience seems to take place out of time), we took Nathan’s advice and moved to sit on the floor to cool off slightly. Then, after another passage of time, the temazcalera placed pillows on the ground, and we laid there, relaxed and refreshed. 

At one point, Narcedalia said something that sounded like she wanted us to open our towels. So, we made our privates public, hoping that’s what she was saying. 

And when she poured water over us in a baño, or bath, I sighed in contentment, and was relieved that we had correctly understood her. She was so gentle, like a mother bathing a baby. And indeed, the shape of the temazcal is round, to mimic a pregnant belly. 

“You’re going into Mother Earth’s womb and back out again,” Nathan told us. 

The massage beds as seen through gauze

Rubbed Down and Relaxed 

Don’t be surprised if your experience is a bit different. Nathan and Orosei are always seeking to enhance the experience, adding a sensory element here, a spa treatment there. (They’ve got plans to have patrons do a natural mud mask after the temazcal, once the pores are good and open.) 

After our temazcal, we skipped the cold plunge and went into the nearby building, where we had changed out of our clothes. Now we got ready for our massages. There are so many nice touches, including a blindfold and aromatic herbs placed by our noses — both of which connected back to the temazcal experience. 

Nathan hired Narcedalia and her two sisters to act as temazcaleras and put them through massage school. I don’t know that I’ve ever been more relaxed after a rub-down. We had turned into puddles of goop. After a cup of tea, Duke and I got up slowly, put our clothes back on and literally oozed outside. 

Wally, blissed out after the temazcal and massage

We sat in the courtyard and chatted with Nathan, who grew up splitting his time between this village and Texas. He walked us around, showing us the various herbs used in the temazcal. It’s a variety that might include: boldo (the most common), basil, rosemary, rue, fennel, aloe vera, vicks plant, hierba maestra and hierba buena. 

Nathan and Orosei grow most of their own herbs to open your lungs, your pores and perhaps even your soul.

Nathan, the owner of Temazcal Oaxaca, showed us the various herbs grown in the courtyard and used in the temazcal.

Vicks plant, on the left, is Mexico’s natural version of Vicks VapoRub.

While his family has operated a temazcal for decades, this site opened in October 2021. Nathan is an astute entrepreneur — he’s got a vision, and the experience he has created is one of a kind. 

We highly recommend adding Temazcal Oaxaca to your itinerary. It’d be best to do so toward the end of your trip — a wonderful way to refresh after days walking in the heat and driving to the charming villages on the outskirts of town. –Wally

Wally and Duke stand on either side of the Mixtec symbol for a heart.

When you’re done, say a prayer of thanks to the god of temazcales.

 

Temazcal Oaxaca

Allende Santa María Coyotepec
71254 Oaxaca
México

4 Unforgettable Experiences in Palm Cove, Australia

From fishing the Great Barrier Reef to exploring Daintree Rainforest, these activities in the Tropical North Queensland hotspot should be on your bucket list. 

Palm Cove is a great spot to base yourself when visiting Tropical North Queensland.

There’s something magical about Palm Cove. It’s known for its sleepy, almost dream-like environment, stunning landscapes and great weather all year round.

But there’s more to this village located 25 minutes away from Cairns Airport. The best thing about Palm Cove is that it’s a gateway to Tropical North Queensland’s most beloved spots. There are tons of different activities and exciting experiences that you really must try at least once before you die. Below are my absolute favorites:

“The best thing about Palm Cove is that it’s a gateway to Tropical North Queensland’s most beloved spots.”

Alexandra Falls at Cape Tribulation in Daintree Rainforest

1. Exploration of the Daintree Rainforest

If you have been to Queensland but you haven’t yet gone to the Daintree Rainforest, there’s a lot that you’ve been missing out on.

The Daintree Rainforest is one of the crown jewels not only of Tropical North Queensland, but also of the whole Land Down Under.

It’s listed as a World Heritage site and is thought to be the oldest jungle in the world. If only trees could talk, they could certainly tell just how cool it was to be around during the age of the dinosaurs. After all, Daintree would have basically been the real-life Jurassic Park!

Not everyone is allowed to go deep into this jungle and explore, but you can venture into a particular area of this massive rainforest: the Mossman Gorge. It’s relatively large in size, with an impressive 56,000-hectare area — but even that is still just a small fraction of the Daintree Rainforest.

Nevertheless, there is still an abundance of activities that you can partake in at the Mossman Gorge, including snorkeling in the river and participating  in a traditional smoking ceremony of the Kuku Yalanji tribe. You can also join other tours of the rainforest, conducted by friendly and professional guides.

Clownfish aren’t going to be catches of the day if you go fishing at the Great Barrier Reef.

2. Fishing expedition at the Great Barrier Reef

Near the Daintree Rainforest is another World Heritage site: the Great Barrier Reef. This wondrous locale is most well known for its crystal clear and calm waters, beautiful corals, and fantastic diving and snorkeling spots.

But aside from seeing the beauty of the underwater world up close and personal, you can also test out your angler skills at the Great Barrier Reef, as several fishing charter trips are offered there. One of the most popular charter trips is the one offered by Cairns Marlin Marina.

Book a fishing charter out of Cairns Marlin Marina.

It’s a fishing trip that’s suitable for all levels of anglers. The club will take you to a fantastic fishing spot at the reef. And if you have luck, you’ll reel in some good catches, such as trevally, codfish and coral trout — as well as the more common mackerel, marlin and tuna.

Mt. Uncle Distillery is one of the stops on Brett’s Outback Tasting Adventures.

3. Foodie bus tour adventures

If you consider yourself to be a foodie, then this adventure will certainly excite your taste buds, fill your tummy and be a treat for your other senses as well.

Brett’s Outback Tasting Adventures offers a bus tour of some of the greatest local restaurants, cafés and shops. It kicks off at Port Douglas, then takes you to seven different spots that offer delectable cuisines. Some of the participating sites could include: Gallo Dairyland, Jaques Coffee Plantation, Mt. Uncle Distillery, Tjapukai Aboriginal Cultural Park, Golden Drop Winery and the Platypus Hut, where you can watch the sunset.

Check out the cheese-making process at Gallo Dairyland.

Make sure you leave enough room for the food you’ll be tasting along the way — and there’s going to be a lot of it, that’s for sure!

While it’s technically a bus tour, you can use your own car to follow along if you prefer.

Pampering ahead!

4. Award-winning spa services at the Reef House

There’s no denying that what comes after all those invigorating yet taxing activities is a tired body.

That’s why while you’re in Palm Cove, you should have your mind and body reinvigorated by unwinding at the Reef House’s spa.

The Reef House is a world-class boutique hotel that offers luxurious accommodations. Relaxing at its spa is a great way to cap off your trip to Palm Cove — so you can go back home without a physical and mental toll on your body.  

Think about ending your trip with a massage to work through any knots you got hiking — and go home all blissed out.

A plethora of fun and unique activities await you at Palm Cove, whether it’s a relaxing fishing trip, an exotic food field trip, or a replenishing massage or facial. There’s always something to look forward to, no matter your age or personality. –Sophie Armstrong

 

Spa Day Heaven: Padma Spa at Plataran Borobudur

If you’re in Java, relax with a massage and scrub — though it’s all about the volcanic stone tub and epic view.

Our treatment room overlooked the jungle-covered mountain

Indonesian hospitality is in full effect at Padma Spa at Plataran Borobudur Resort. The exotic teakwood villa that houses the space sits perched like a Javanese treehouse on a hillside overlooking a dense forest of teak, casuarina and rasamala trees.

The facility offers a wide range of options and features six treatment rooms equipped with bathtubs carved from volcanic stone taken from nearby Mount Merapi as well as a relaxation lounge, nail salon and gym. They also have a small but well-curated assortment of items for sale in the reception area.

Among the elements incorporated into the spa’s design are intricately hand-carved teak fretwork window panels reflecting the region’s cultural heritage.

“The first thing we noticed was the volcanic stone tub, big enough for both of us.

The room offered floor-to-ceiling views across the jungle valley to the temple of Borobudur.”

The spa is on the grounds of Plataran Borobudur

Java Nadi Massage

Our visit began with cool towels and cups of ginger tea. Wally and I opted for the 60-minute Java Nadi massage. The spa director suggested we add a body scrub from the treatment menu. We agreed to add the 45-minute Lakshmi scrub — and were glad we did.

When we entered our treatment room, the first thing we noticed was the freestanding Merapi stone soaking tub, big enough for both of us. Flooded with natural light, the room offered floor-to-ceiling views across the jungle valley to the ancient Buddhist temple of Borobudur in the distance.

After we had changed into our robes, our feet were placed in basins of warm water to soak. Each therapist added bath salts, kaffir lime wheels, lemongrass, dried pomelo slices and peppermint essential oil, which gave off a delightfully revitalizing aroma.

Various natural ingredients are used in the spa’s treatments

We were asked to lie face-down under the top sheet on our massage tables. The tone from a single-note energy chime resonated as it was tapped three times before beginning.

The word “nadi” refers to the pathways or channels of energy that run throughout the human body. Java Nadi is a healing technique rooted in centuries-old traditions. Its aim is to restore balance and energy to the body.

A unique combination of slow, fluid movements, incorporating deep kneading and thumb pressure, this hands-on holistic treatment eases muscle and joint pain while increasing circulation.

When our massage had concluded, we experienced the hammam-like Lakshmi scrub: an aromatic combination of sandalwood, ground rice, lemongrass, candlenut and grapefruit that left our skin silky smooth.

Wally didn’t want to ever get out of the volcanic stone bathtub

Duke relaxes in the milk bath after the massage and body scrub

We finished by relaxing (OK, there was some goofing off as well) in the dramatic bathtub, which was filled with a lemongrass milk soak. As we gazed out the window, it felt like we were hovering over the landscape. Eventually, I was able to convince Wally to leave the tub.

I wanted to take home the earthenware teapot, batik robes and energy chime — but I didn’t want the bad karma. We loved every minute of our experience, and it put us in a deep state of relaxation. –Duke

Plataran Borobudur Resort & Spa
Dusun Tanjungan
Borobudur, Magelang
Jawa Tengah 56553
Indonesia

Taksu Spa: A Wellness Wonderland in Ubud

Try the Esalen massage at this gorgeous spa that offers healthy meals, yoga and other treatments.

Wally relaxes on the bridge at Taksu, after his amazing Esalen massage

Like the wardrobe that leads to the magical realm of Narnia, the unassuming building at the end of the lane doesn’t even begin to hint at the wonders that lie behind it.

“Then came a massage unlike any other we’ve experienced.

It was as if a Balinese dancer (or, more appropriately, a four-armed Hindu goddess) was moving her arms in all directions at once.”

The buildings at Taksu are nestled in lush greenery

The Quiet Stretch of Buddha Street

The night before our appointment, Duke and I found ourselves wandering around Ubud. It was still new to us, each street opening up like a flower, revealing its own personality. We had just crossed Jalal Dewisita, strolling down Jalal Goutama, which I nicknamed Buddha Street. Suddenly we were filled with a sense of calm. The restaurants that were open didn’t blast music. Conversation was subdued, respectful. Everyone seemed to have come to an agreement that this stretch of the street would offer a quiet oasis.

I turned to Duke and said, “I feel like this is where Taksu will be.” Sure enough, about five steps farther, we saw the sign for Taksu off to the right. As my dad, who tends to get words adorably wrong, has said, “ESPN runs in the family.”

There’s a very zen feel to the spa

Taksu Spa: A Hidden Oasis in Ubud

Once you step beyond that unassuming façade at Taksu Spa, you enter another world. The grounds are situated in a small valley, which a river literally runs through. The rains were so intense recently, the spa had to raise the bridge that spans the ravine.

Statues of the Buddha are tucked into various nooks on the spa grounds

Paths wind through zen gardens, ending in a small copse with a Buddha statue. Go off in another direction and you’ll pass a building that houses one of the two yoga schools or the Hindu shrine for the staff to worship at.

These poles are part of the hydroponic garden, growing herbs and veggies

Enjoy a quiet meal or snack at the café

Other trails lead to a hydroponic garden growing basil, lettuce, mint. Then you’ll come to the chill out zone and café, meandering past water features and an affordable all-you-can-eat salad bar in front of the open kitchen, where the smiling chef waves amidst his culinary creation.

Namaste

Taksu is one of those foreign words that has no direct translation. It acts as a linguistic suitcase, packing in a lot of meaning into those five letters. One way of defining it is as the essence of the spirit, explains Jero, the spa’s marketing advisor, who took us on a tour of the complex. It’s often a trait performers search for: a divine inspiration channeled into the ability to captivate an audience.

This cool waterfall feature is the centerpiece of Taksu, and helps create the relaxing atmosphere

That idea of wellness pervades everything at Taksu, from massage to yoga to healthy food options. In fact, they plan to open a wellness center as well, to help people live a wholesome lifestyle, learning what foods to eat and good behaviors to follow.

We had our massages in a building at the far end of the bridge

Our First Esalen Massage

Jero led us across the bridge, under a curtain of banyan branches, to a group of rooms at the far end of the grounds. Duke and I were shown into a room and told to change into those black mesh panties that fit as flatteringly as a shower cap.

Wally and Duke are two super sweet travel bloggers "obsessed with other cultures, religion, folklore, architecture, handicrafts and food" as they put it themselves. It was a delight to have you both with us today, @notsoinnocents! Come and see us again very soon! .. . . . . #taksuspa #exploreubud
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A post shared by Taksu Spa & Restaurant (@taksuspa) on May 2, 2018 at 2:46am PDT

We let the masseuses know we were ready and lay side by side. And then came a massage unlike any other we’ve experienced. It was as if a Balinese dancer (or, more appropriately, a four-armed Hindu goddess) was moving her arms in all directions at once.

Most massages focus on one area at a time, starting with the right shoulder, then on to the left shoulder, followed by the lower back, then moving down to the legs… But during this massage, the masseuse would simultaneously sweep up my leg while kneading my back. She’d work on one of my shoulders while somehow massaging my arms at the same time. The massage felt holistic, especially compared to past treatments, and you never knew what was coming.

What was this magical massage technique? I wanted to know. It’s called Esalen, and those long, sweeping strokes, the stretching, the acupressure, even an exchange of energy that sounds reminiscent of reiki — it’s all part of a school of practice created in the 1960s in Big Sur, California.

Post-massage smoothie, juice and amuse-bouche

The shrimp was spicy and sweet — and delicous

Duke and Wally became obsessed with cold soups in Ubud — they’re refreshing and can be found on many menus in town

Afterward, as Duke and I enjoyed smoothies and a light lunch of chilled soup and spicy honeyed shrimp, we felt utterly recharged, ready to explore the bustling town of Ubud and its surrounding jungle.

You’d never guess that all this lies at the end of a quiet street in Ubud. Part of the appeal of Taksu is that magic of discovery, though there are plans to renovate the spa’s façade, to give a better hint at the gorgeousness just beyond. –Wally

Wally, with that post-massage glow

A refreshed and reinvigorated Duke

Taksu Spa
Jalan Goutama Selatan
Ubud, Kabupaten, Gianyar
Bali 80571
Indonesia

Makkha: A True Spa Experience in Chiang Mai, Thailand

The aromatherapy massage at this delightful day spa is a treat for your senses.

Awaiting our aromatherapy massages in Makkha’s gorgeous lobby

For the second largest city in Thailand, Chiang Mai is decidedly laidback — especially when compared to the frenetic pace of its capital Bangkok. But it’s still nice to escape an itinerary packed with temples and daytrips, which is exactly what Duke and I did when we visited Makkha Health & Spa, tucked down one of the Old City’s narrow side streets.

Beer, the delightful receptionist at Makkha

We were welcomed to the spa by the lovely Beer, who immediately made us feel at home, which is fitting as Makkha occupies a 50-year-old traditional Lanna-style home with wood-paneled walls. Soft light glows through intricate latticework, surrounded by polished dark teak.

Beer brought over cups of bael tea, made from dried slices of the thick-skinned spherical fruit, also known as wood apple. The tea has a distinct, smoky aroma with a hint of sourness and has been used for centuries as an Ayurvedic digestive tonic. It reminded me of chai, Duke of matcha (though I’d trust Duke’s palate more than mine). These were accompanied by a tightly coiled cold towel, which we’re never 100% clear what to do with, so we rub our hands and forearms and usually do a quick cooling scrub to the back of our necks.

So beloved is the bael tree that a folktale exists in the sacred Hindu text the Garuda Purana about a hunter on the night of Shivarathri, an annual festival celebrating Lord Shiva, the blue-skinned deity. The story goes that the man climbed a bael tree while waiting to hunt animals that had come to quench their thirst at a nearby pond. Also beneath the tree was a Shiva lingam, and as he waited, the hunter absentmindedly plucked some leaves, which dropped onto the linga. Through this unconscious act, he had worshipped Shiva and attained moksha, a concept similar to nirvana.

The rooms at Makkha are soothingly neutral — letting the massage experience come to the forefront of your senses

We had opted for the two-hour body scrub and aromatherapy massage. We were led to our respective treatment rooms, instructed to take a quick shower and asked to change into the mesh underwear the spa provided. The shampoo, from a Thai company called Wan Waan, is essential oil-based and doesn’t lather (read: chemical-free). I had never experienced a shampoo like this before and really enjoyed it — plus, no conditioner necessary! In fact, we liked it so much we purchased a bottle of the lavender shampoo to take home.

When the therapist returned to the room, she began with the scrub, sloughing off the grime that accumulates during travel. The first targets are your legs and feet — excellent for weary travelers who have been walking almost nonstop for days.

Somehow she seemed to keep both hands moving over me, but switched from scrubbing salts to oil without pause. Maybe she was magic. The scrub does a great job of exfoliation, leaving you feeling rejuvenated. It reminded Duke of a slightly less intense, much more pleasant-smelling hammam scrub.

The Wan Waan essential oil-based products the spa uses are available for purchase

Aromatherapy Massage: Heaven Scent

Beer had mentioned that Makkha’s signature scent is jasmine, which I selected for my aromatherapy massage. Its warm, floral scent filled the room, making it easy for me to imagine myself in a tropical garden. Thinking of its mosquito-repellent properties, Duke chose citronella. Lavender, rose and orange cinnamon are also available.

It began with a deep tissue massage through a sheet, a traditional Thai technique. She then proceeded to climb up onto the table, straddling me, and used her hands, forearms and elbows to knead out my knots.

I like a strong massage to work through my knots and tension. I’m glad I didn’t check “extra strong,” though. These women have powerful hands. You can request a gentle, more relaxing rubdown if you prefer. Really, though, there’s something so wonderful having a masseuse knead your muscles until they go from as taut as a pulled string to relaxed and reinvigorated. When it gets sort of painful — no pain, no gain, as they say — I focus on the music.

Makkha Health & Spa’s lobby

After our massage, Duke and I were served sticky rice with mango, refreshed and ready to face the afternoon.

Forget the crowded outdoor market massages and treat yourself to the warm and welcoming Makkha Health & Spa. It’s the perfect way to relax and recharge before or after an adventure. –Wally

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Makkha Health & Spa

38/1 Soi Ratchamanka 8 Phra Sing Amphoe Mueang

Chiang Mai 50200, Thailand

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What’s the Best Hammam Spa Experience in Fes, Morocco?

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Get pampered (and scrubbed and steamed) at Palais Amani’s hammam spa in Fès, Morocco

Reinvigorate yourself at the luxury hammam Les Bains Amani.

 

A spa day in Morocco isn’t quite the same thing you’d expect in the United States. But hammams have been a part of the Moroccan culture for centuries — and you’ll leave literally transformed. I'm not quite exaggerating when I say you'll feel like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis.

So if you’re in Fès and you don’t stay at Palais Amani, you at least need to undergo its one-of-a-kind hammam experience. I recommend doing so your last full day in town. If you go earlier, the sometimes stressful navigation of the medina’s winding pathways might negate its calming, rejuvenating effects.

“You’ll leave literally transformed. I’m not quite exaggerating when I say you’ll feel like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis.”

Here’s a walk-through of our day of bliss at Les Bains Amani:

Chambre No. 1

The changing room

After a brief wait in the lovely interior courtyard, amidst the gurgling of a fountain and the chirping of birds in the lush foliage, Soukaina, who works in the spa at Palais Amani, approached us. Her beautiful face framed by a head scarf, she led us to a side entrance near the dining area. Up some stairs and into a cozy room with two lounges.

We had been told to bring swimsuits, but to be honest, the typical men’s swimming trunks would be too bulky. If you’re a Speedo type guy, you’d be all set. I instead opted for boxer briefs, which worked out great. They ended up soaking wet by the end, so just remember to bring a spare pair of underwear or you’ll be going commando.

We donned the fluffy robes provided for us, stretched out on the lounges and wondered what awaited us.

Chambre No. 2

Hand and foot scrub

Our hostess returned and led us down to the hammam. It’s in the basement, where the original kitchen once was. Inside a small antechamber, Duke and I sat on a marble bench while the silhouettes of two women emerged from the dark — jagged chiaroscuros in the flickering of candlelight.

Using a mixture of rose water and bran, they began scrubbing our feet and hands.

When my woman got to one of my strange, bulbous thumbs, she stopped, confused and looked at me.

“No problem?” she asked.

I didn’t really know what to say, so I laughed and assured her, “Ça marche.” That works.

Then she got to the other thumb and grabbed it playfully.

“Les deux,” I told her, to indicate they’re both like that. I was really growing fond of her.

Finishing off the process, the women ran a white clay and henna mixture through our hair. Soukina had assured us it wouldn’t dye our hair at all, though I think it would have been fun seeing what it’s like being a faux ginger for a bit, like the adorable vicar on Grantchester.

Chambre No. 3

Rinse, scrub and steam

This is where things got pretty intense. We were led into an adjoining room. It’s larger, with seating along two sides and a fireplace along one end, a large cauldron of water in its depths.

You stand in front of the cauldron, and the women alternately scrub your epidermis raw with exfoliation gloves and pour warm, soothing water over you to rinse the soap off. They grab handfuls of what is referred to as black soap (and is actually a dark brown abrasive goo made of argan oil and mint).

We had visited the small hammam attached to our riad in Marrakech, and after the vigorous scrubbing, I told Duke that, believe it or not, it actually hurt more than getting my tattoo.

I might have been exaggerating. A bit.

It’s almost too bad it was so dark in the room. You can’t see all the skin they’ve sloughed off. I can attest from our last hammam, when there was more light, that there are dark rings of dead skin that collect around your wrists and, presumably, ankles.

You'll feel like you’ve been rebirthed. Fresh, soft and new.

After the dermabrasion, the ladies left us to soak up the steam. We sat on our benches as the room filled with thick, billowing white clouds. It grew more and more difficult to breathe. Soukaina had mentioned that if it gets too hot to let the staff know, and they’ll release some of the steam.

I could tell Duke was starting to freak out, so I suggested we both lie down. That definitely helped us relax.

And just when we thought we had been forgotten and would end up a puddle of water like Frosty the Snowman in the greenhouse, our scrubbing saviors came to fetch us.

Chambre No. 4

Douche

That’s French for shower, sillies. Here’s another useful phrase: un peu trop chaud (“uh puh trow show,” more or less). A little too hot.

It came in handy when my attendant expected me to enter the scalding hot shower.

We were left on your own for this portion. I was so used to being completely pampered, I would have just stood there all day, waiting to be lathered up if Duke hadn’t gone first and let me know we actually had to do the work during this segment.

Again, I could only imagine the skin I shed. It must’ve looked like a snake had molted before it slipped down the drain.

Back to Chambre No. 2

Drying off

The shower room led back to the antechamber where we had our foot and hand scrubs.

Here the two women dried us off. Mine made an adorable production of including my belly button, which made us both giggle. Then they put us in hooded robes. I felt like Emperor Palpatine in Star Wars.

Back upstairs to Chambre No. 1

Tea and relaxation

In the changing room once again, we found a pot of tea waiting for us, along with a plate of coconut macaroons. We nibbled on the delicious cookies and exalted in our luxurious excursion. I could literally do this every day. Maybe I was royalty in a past life. It just felt right.

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Chamomile tea and coconut macaroons awaited us after the hammam experience

Chambre no. 5

Massage

After 20 or so minutes, Soukaina knocked on the door and led us down one floor to the massage room. Duke and I got massages next to each other. It’s not a relaxing rub — but it’s also not a deep-tissue to work through knotted muscles either. It’s something in between.

At one point, my masseuse bent my legs and arms into bizarre contortions. It confused me at first, but ultimately felt good.

After the massage, you shower in the en suite bathroom. This was when I realized I didn’t have dry underpants. I survived.

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Wally basks in that post-hammam glow

Feeling utterly transformed, relaxed, pampered, ready to face anything, Duke and I emerged into the gorgeous courtyard and sat at a small table to eat the light lunch that was included in the Drop In and Unwind package.

Following lunch, we explored a bit of the hotel, then enjoyed drinks on the rooftop terrace. I can’t imagine spending a lovelier day. –Wally